What or who "made" me gay (and creepy)

I am not new to the question of "what made you gay". My real answer should be that you aren't "made" gay, but rather that I realized it. Well, either way... here's the culprit: t.A.T.u. (see picture on left), Russian pop duo that garnered international recognition in 2001 for their faux-lesbian routine that intrigued the greater population of the world. I first heard of them when a friend played a CD she burned in the car. I believe that I was in 6th grade at the time when I first had a listen of what would change my life forever. It was the song "Not Gonna Get Us", which was a fast-paced Europop song with techno influence. I demanded to know who was responsible for stealing away my heart and my friend told me the artist and song title, which I tucked away in the darker crevices of my brain for later. At the time, I recently discovered wonderment that was (and is) the internet and now with that on my belt, I was free to surf the virtual oceans, sail the electric seas for them! I downloaded every song, every video, saved every picture of them... I have all of it on my external hard drive and it is always growing. For seven years, I still cannot shake them, having pictures of them over my bed and a bear that I named "Lena" after the redhead. It moved away from being a "crush" to an "obsession" that I now try to ignore all things t.A.T.u. so that I don't spend an entire week just doting on them.

But, though hazardous to my health, I had decided to check up on them and see how they are doing, because I knew that their 3rd album was supposed to have released in Russia by now. Also, a movie featuring their music was supposed to have been released but I heard nothing about it. It seems that Vesyolye Ulybki, their third studio album, was released on October 21, 2008. Russia is so lucky that they can nonchalantly prance into their nearest FYE and pick it up. Sigh... also, the movie "You and I" or "Finding t.A.T.u." is set to come out in 2009, hopefully with Vesyolye Ulybki English counterpart. There has been no confirmation of when the English counterpart is coming out, though, so I am not marking any days down in my mental calender. Anyway, I have been listening to their Russian album and I am happy that there are some songs in English, but I was never hindered by the Russian lyrics before. Either way, it is great! The last time I had a t.A.T.u. binge was months ago, in the summer, when I watched the videos for "Beliy Plaschik" and "220". Watching their videos just reminds me how smitten I am that I sit drooling over my computer for days.

But why? How did this all happen? Well, even when I was in 6th grade or before I came to realize my homosexuality, I was taken by them. Their catchy songs and even their controversy attracted me. But what really made me aflutter, was Elena "Lena" Katina. In comparison to the aggressive, spikey-haired Yulia Volkova, Lena had a softer demeanor. She was curvy, feminine, and fair, that I apparently, even in my supposed straightness, liked. She had a wonderful smile too and her eyes! It all just made me weak. Not only that, she seemed to have the "good girl" image down pat in comparison to her rough-edged Yulia, but she was not entirely sugar-coated. You know, it takes more than one girl to make a sexy faux-lesbian duo! Of course, I was heartbroken to know that they weren't really gay, but I forgave them because their evil producer forced them into it. Anyway, they since gave him the boot and their fans were jaded, feeling lied to and betrayed. However, they spoke for the LGBT community at a gay pride event, stating that they always promoted love without any boundaries.

But I digress. What I really must say is that Lena helped me figure out who I am. She also seemed to define my ideal girl. Red hair, pale skin, curvy, "good girl" (quotations included), feminine, soft personality, eyes that just made me all gaga. That profile's fitting of my girlfriend now. I was told that she even looks like her and for both of us, that's a good thing. Obviously, my girlfriend and Lena are two separate people, but hadn't it been for "what made me gay", I wouldn't have my girlfriend who I love very much.

Oh, not to mention, I have a weakness for well-executed Russian accents. My girlfriend isn't Russian and by no means has an accent, except when she gets angry or passionate about something that her southern accent comes out, but she's basically half-Polish. Polish people and Russian people both have pirogies on their breath, so that's close enough. God, I'm horrible... but to the readers: did you guys have any ridiculous celebrity crushes? Also, are they still your biggest crush today?

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My Conclusions:

• I'm glad I liked t.A.T.u so much. It made me more accepting of girls kissing, but this interest was not so much a big hit at my Catholic school...
• t.A.T.u. is very politically-minded sometimes. The video for "Beliy Plaschik" features an anti-abortion message. I'm pro-choice but I was moved by it.
• New favorite t.A.T.u. song: "Fly On The Wall". They're as stalker-like as I am.
• In the beginning of their careers, they often donned schoolgirl outfits. They weren't like the ones I wore, no sir. If we wore their schoolgirl outfits, I would have recognized that I was gay long before them.
• Originally, I was ashamed of liking them because of the lesbian image that was associated with them. I hid their CD in the basement. I ended up buying a new one years later and now it's all destroyed from how much I listened to it and carried it around.
• Yulia is always said to be hotter than Lena. She's skinny, tan, naughty... she fits the stereotype for "hot". But I don't like skinny girls... curves are where it's at.
  

Hypocrisy and H8 in American Marriage Politics

After the results of the California ballot surfaced to reveal that the majority of voters were "yes" on Proposition 8, there was an uproar coming from the LGBT community and its allies that a fundamental right of marriage was snatched away. The appalling news urged many celebrities-- from the essentials, like Ellen DeGeneres, and others, including Rose McGowan, Drew Barrymore, America Ferrara-- to lend their voice to boost morale to protest Prop 8. However, famous or not, Americans across the nation are coming together for the National Day of Protest Against Prop 8 (and similar anti-gay marriage measures across the country) on November 15th, this Saturday.

Prior to the votes, though, there were plenty of ads from both perspectives on Prop 8, "yes" and "no". The arguments for "yes" asserted that it was not an action that was for the people and it would taint schools, therefore poisoning the minds of young children. It was an unnerving experience that the Republicans lost so much faith in the government over a social issue, rather than the economy which apparently, is not doing so well right now. The way that they were also using children to illustrate a point seems somewhat underhanded. The ads claimed that homosexual marriage would be taught about in elementary school, but there has never been a time, especially not at such a young age, marriage education. The particular ad I watched called "Gay Marriage Has EVERYTHING To Do With School" showed a couple talk about how their 2nd grader told them it was okay for a man and a man to wed, with a picture of the book "King & King" as evidence that there are attempts to convey homosexual themes to children. The couple must have been either Robb and Robin Wirthlin and David and Tonia Parker, two couples that filed a lawsuit against their respective child's school, claiming that sexual education should not be taught in school without the notification of a child's parents. Robb Wirthlin went on CNN to say that his problem is "this issue of romantic attraction between two men is being presented to my seven-year-old as wonderful, and good and the way things should be".

In rebuttal, it is not right to regard homosexual relationships as purely sexual by referring to their presence in education as "sexual education". The book is a clever story, but it is surely not trying to manipulate the minds of children to believe that it is "the way things should be". There are many more stories and fairy tales that tell of a princess for a prince; it is embedded in folklore and one book cannot dramatically change culture from the extreme of entirely heterosexual to entirely homosexual living. Rather, there is the in-between of coexistence, where the two ends of the spectrum of sexual orientation live harmoniously. That is the book's purpose; to promote acceptance, not necessarily homosexuality. The judge understood this and claimed, "Diversity is the hallmark of our nation."

The bigger gripe I have for the "yessers" is that there is always a religious aspect of the debate that is more influential than it should be. The fundamental right of marriage is the government's duty to uphold and it should not be swayed by religion, because of the separation of Church and state. In an online ad made by two brothers, they portray two Mormon men, who barge into the house of a lesbian couple to "take their rights". They pull of their wedding bands, rummage through drawers and their belongings, when they find their marriage certificate. One of the women tries to stop them, by saying that they have rights and one of the men rights it, claiming, "Not if we can help it." It is sinister and it gives facts of that the LDS Church paid over $20 million to have Prop 8 passed. Another fact it stated was that if Prop 8 was passed, then the marriage rights of legally wed gay couples would be stripped. Like how I stand on religion and government, it says at the end to not let a Church run the state. But now, I'm just repeating myself....

It's just there is so much to be said that could have been saved had there been that simple "No".

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My Conclusions:

• Bridget McManus, my favorite comedienne (also an "out" and married lesbian), is in the "Home Invasion" ad with the Mormon boys. She is the one with dark brown hair.
• Please look up "Home Invasion Anti Prop 8" or something of that sort on Youtube. It is an entertaining ad, creepy and meaningful.
• I am supportive of religion, but not of using it to endorse hate. I admit that "Home Invasion" was very biased, however it told a disturbing, exaggerated story of what the hate could escalate to: your marriage not being your business anymore.
• Visit http://www.noonprop8.com/ .
• The National Day of Protest Against Prop 8 is on my birthday.
  

Gay rights stigmatized in liberal election

The election yesterday has marked very significant liberal triumphs, such as Barack Obama winning the ballot and being coined the first African American president; yet, gay rights has been denied its justice again by California voters, who approved of the gay rights ban that Proposition 8 flaunted. The blow that has been delivered on the LGBT community left a population stunned that their court system would rule that marriage is not reserved for only heterosexual couples, then they would steal that basic right away.

The constitutional amendment was seen as the most momentous of the 153 ballot measures and was the most expensive, in that spending for and against reached $74 million. It has become the most expensive social-issues campaign in American history and the most expensive campaign in the White House this year outside of race. Gay rights activists have seen a very rough election elsewhere, as well. Amendments to ban gay marriage were approved in Arizona and Florida and Arkansas voters approved a measure banning unmarried couples from serving as adoptive or foster parents, supporters making it clear that gays and lesbians were their main target.

In California, with 95 percent of precincts reporting Wednesday, the ban had 5,125,752 votes (52%) while 4,725,313 votes (48%) opposed.

Now, those are all the facts and in my opinion, I am absolutely shocked that our country, especially California, was so harsh to take back the privilege of marriage from gays/lesbians. It makes me consider what the main argument is in the anti-gay rallies and from my research, I gathered that it is mainly religion that influences the opinion of Prop 8's "yessers". If that is the case, I think that it is a poor argument because if gay marriage is going to be dealt with politically, then the religious stance should be invalidated, since government is meant to be secular, since the time that separation of Church and state was established. Rather, it should have been decided in the court and stayed in the court, rather than challenged by the votes of those who have Puritanically-influenced mindsets.

The way that gay marriage has been denied, allowed, then denied again demonstrates the prevalence of intolerant, irrational Bible-thumping values that are polluting the population of America and the population of Christians. I frequent Church and the way that the Scriptures are used to justify hate is appalling. The Bible should not be put at face value. I am not hateful towards any religion, finding myself to be part of the Church that is often cited as opponents of gays, but I do not believe in what I grew up with being used as a tool for intolerance.

I hope that California rethinks this...

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My Conclusions:

• I apologize for ranting.
• Notice how the guy in the first picture looks like a Chuck that makes moose burgers and polishes his gun that's over his mantle, in his underwear, while the people in the second picture don't look quite so insane.
• Sorry to stereotype but moustaches say a lot about a person... because really, moustaches?!
• I have nothing more to say than what has been said and that I'm really thirsty.